I don't get lost any more

by Stuart O'Connor from guardian.co.uk

Actor Rachel Shelley thinks of herself as a luddite, but is still marvelling at her new iPhone

What's your favourite piece of technology?
I have to admit firstly that I don't have many. But of the ones I do have, it's my iPhone. Probably it outshines my laptop because it's still new. I only got it a month ago, and I'm still marvelling at how fantastic it is.

How has it improved your life?
I don't get lost any more, which to me is just fantastic. I've spent so much time away from London in the past five or six years, and coming back I realise I've forgotten my way around – now my iPhone tells me where I am. It has made life a lot easier.

When was the last time you used it, and what for?
This morning. I find that I can have a really sneaky lie-in and feel like I'm doing some work because I can reply to emails and read the news – do all that kind of stuff. I feel less guilty doing that on my iPhone than doing it on my computer.

What additional features would you add if you could?
You can't text photos – or if you can I haven't figured it out – so I'd like to be able to do that. And it would be great if you could use it as a walkie-talkie because I now have so many friends nearby who have an iPhone.

Do you think it will be obsolete in 10 years' time?
Definitely. I think the way technology will keep on improving I'm sure everyone will have a videophone.

What one tip would you give to non-iPhone users?
That the texting takes some time to get used to – it was the one thing that almost put me off. Once you get used to it, it's actually very good. And don't overload your phone with lots of applications and games, because it does cause it to crash.

Do you consider yourself to be a luddite or a nerd?
Generally a luddite, but with sudden unexpected peaks of nerdiness which surprise even me.

What's the most expensive piece of technology you've ever owned?
Probably my MacBook. I'm not big on technology; I only get what I need.

Mac or PC?
I've always been Mac, so I guess I always will be. I can't imagine I will change now.

What song is at the top of your iPod's top 25 most-played list?
At the moment, a sudden entry at number one for me is Paper Planes by MIA and AR Ramen, from the Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack.

Will robots rule the world?
No, I think that's a crazy idea.

What piece of technology would you most like to own?
I do have a fantasy piece of technology that would do my food shopping for me, and if you wanted to you could probably employ a butler or a maid. But I'd like to have a fridge that restocks itself. I don't know what you'd call that – an automatic restocking pantry?

The Farm Recap 101: Very Bad Girls

By Julia Watson, on April 1st, 2009 from http://www.velvetparkmedia.com

Call it a stroke of fate, the scoop of the year, or what you will, but yours truly got her hot little hands on an advanced copy of the pilot episode of The L Word’s spin-off series. Yes, folks! I’m talking about The Farm, starring Leisha Hailey. Thar be spoilers ahead…

Alice is stripping off a pair of dirt-stained blue coveralls. As she undresses, she stares into the mirror, her expression distant, incredulous. The scene flashes to Alice, orange jumpsuit-begarbed, sitting in a courtroom as a judge pronounces her guilty of second-degree murder in the killing of one Jennifer Schecter. In the courtroom, she bears the same shocked but slightly removed expression.

The scene flashes back to the present. Al heads into a group shower area, where a few other women are already naked under the steamy spray. Clearly nervous, waxing friendly, Al greets them, but the others ignore her ? except for one. A stern-faced young black woman gives her a terse nod of acknowledgment. Al attempts to strike up a friendly conversation with her nearest neighbor as she showers. Again, she is ignored. Someone laughs behind her and she turns, delighted at the sound of real, live mirth.

It’s the stern woman and three others. “Hi, Wade!” Alice begins brightly, taking in the expressions of open malice on the faces of the others. “What can I do for ya?” Quick as a flash, Wade grabs Alice by the throat, slamming her back against the wall. Alice struggles, but the others, including a blond girl with a swastika tattooed on her arm, flank her, pinning her arms. Wade belts her hard across the face. “You can start showing me the proper respect, Freshie. That’s what you can do for me.” She leers. “For starters.” Off Alice’s expression of pain and dismay…

The opening credits roll amidst scenes of little girls playing on a playground ? monkey bars, dodgeball, double dutch. The music is a punk girl group covering Johnny Cash’s “Folsom Prison Blues.” The behavior of the girls gets more and more menacing, bullying, as they play, until their games and smiles take on new, sinister meaning.

A yellow prison bus rattles down a dusty road through fields and farms. A title reads “Earlier that day.” Inside the bus is Alice, seated across the aisle from the bus’s other lone occupant, (Famke Janssen, HOT!!!) a strikingly attractive woman who radiates calm self-assurance. Both women are handcuffed and wear orange prison jumpsuits. Alice: “She believed me at first. But after they found stupid Jenny’s diary everything changed. I guess it was doomed anyway after everything that has happened. A cop and a convicted murderer? Not exactly West Side Story material.” Famke’s character, Valentina, smiles ruefully. Alice asks her what she’s “in for,” but Val just smiles.

The bus pulls up to a security gate and we get our first glimpse of “The Farm.” Farm it is, with fields, orchards and even a livestock barn surrounded by pens of goats. Women in green coveralls are busy rebuilding a fence in a nearby pasture. The bus pulls up in front of a compound surrounded by a tall chain-link fence topped with razor wire. A wiry-looking middle-aged woman in a guard uniform stands out in front, waiting for them.

The guard introduces herself as Officer Miller. She seems particularly interested in Valentina, giving her a long once-over. They follow her into the main office and Alice starts asking questions, rapid-fire, about living quarters, working the farm, etc. Officer Miller tells her the warden will be happy to answer those kinds of questions. Alice: “We get to meet the warden?” Miller: “She likes to meet all the new inmates herself first thing, to explain how we do things here.”

Alice and Valentina wait silently with Officer Miller outside the warden’s office. A raucous bark of laughter comes from behind the closed door, on which a sign reads: Warden Margaret Elder. A moment later the door swings open, revealing Laurie Metcalf (Roseanne) in slacks and a flannel button down shirt with a collar. She’s alone and beckons them in with a hearty welcome. The warden dismisses Officer Miller, asking her to go get some ammo (?). Alice: “Ammo? You’re not gonna use that on us, I hope!” The warden laughs again, a hyena-like cackle. Warden Elder: “Not if you play your cards right, Pieszecki.”

The warden unlocks their handcuffs herself. Her office is crammed with knickknacks and there’s a Survivor: Vanuatu calendar on the wall. She tells them it’s a privilege to be placed there, to be outside in the fresh air all day instead of being locked up on a cell block. The farm is a minimum security facility, we learn, but “discipline and protocol are strictly enforced.” Alice is relieved to learn that instead of cell blocks, inmates live together in barracks with members of their assigned work group, called “yards.” Alice and Valentina are assigned together to Yard Three. The warden suggests that they work hard and keep their heads down, and they’ll do just fine here. Warden: “Right, Galindo?” Valentina, in a cool, measured tone: “Yes, ma’am.” They lock eyes for a beat, and the warden nods. They understand one another. Alice looks lost, another question forming on her lips.

Just then there’s a knock at the door. In walks a young woman wearing blue coveralls, sporting a curly afro and a guileless, goofy grin. The woman, to the warden: “You wanted to see me, Boss?” Warden: “Ah, Ammo. Yes, meet your new yardmates, Alice Pieszecki and Valentina Galindo.” Ammo’s eyes widen at the mention of Valentina’s name. Alice catches this, shooting Valentina a piercing look. The warden asks Ammo to show the newcomers to the laundry and the barracks. Then it’s straight to work! Ammo seems happy to have scored this duty.

Ammo chats easily with Alice as they make their way to the laundry, but she seems a little in awe of Valentina. They’ve arrived just in time, Ammo says. It’s the last Friday of the month, and there’ll be a competition later that afternoon to see which of the yards get the best work assignments for the following month. Yard Three has been short on manpower and could use two extra pairs of hands. Alice is surprised to learn about the competition, but Ammo says that isn’t all: the yards compete regularly for all sorts of privileges ? better food, computer lab time, entertainment ? you name it. Apparently the warden is a big fan of reality TV and has taken a cue from Survivor in running the place. (Oh dear.) Alice says it sounds almost fun. Ammo: “It’s not so bad when your team wins. Lately? We been dead last.” She grumbles about their leader.

The newbies drop off armloads of clean jumpsuits and linens at their new digs (Valentina takes the top bunk above Alice.) and they quickly change into their new blue coveralls. While dressing, Alice notices a beautiful tattoo on Valentina’s left shoulder blade ? a tree with tiny tear-shaped leaves. Valentina catches her looking and smiles.

The three women sign out at the front desk under the watchful eye of a guard, and they head out the front gate toward the barn. As they approach the barn’s side yard, a piercing wail sounds. Ammo curses and starts off at a run, Alice and Valentina hurrying after her. A pretty young Latina woman is crouched in the mud, her hands over her ears, sobbing as a rough-looking blond girl (Ooh! It’s swastika chick!) stands over her, nudging her with her boot and letting loose a stream of dirty words in a singsong-y voice. Both wear blue coveralls matching the ones Alice, Valentina and Ammo are wearing. A ways back, a few other similarly clad women watch the scene unfolding without interfering.

Glam promo shot for Blond Swastika Chick/Melody.

Ammo, to Blondie: “You leave her alone! What the hell is your problem, Melody?” Melody gives the woman a vicious kick. Her face impassive, Val moves to stand at Ammo’s side. Ammo: “Melody, you ain’t met Valentina yet. Valentina Galindo?” Clearly the name registers. The woman on the ground continues to sob and, disgusted, Blondie/Melody steps away from her. Melody, to Ammo: “Handle your bitch, bitch.” Ammo helps the woman up from the ground. Crying woman, to Ammo: “She be talking nasty to me!” Ammo pats her back consolingly. Val, still perfectly calm, stares down an uncomfortable-looking Melody.

Another woman (the one who attacked Alice in the opening teaser, Wade) appears, asking what the hell is going on. She tells Melody, Ammo and crying girl to get back to work and they comply. Wade brusquely informs Valentina that it’s not her place to handle squabbles between yardmates. Wade: “That’s my job. Got it?” Refusing to be baited, Valentina politely introduces herself, and Alice, too; her unwavering courtesy makes Wade uneasy. She sets them to their first task: mucking out the pig pen. Gross.

Alice balks at the foul stink of the place. Wade: “This ain’t no Sunnybrook and you ain’t named Rebecca.” Alice: “Actually my name is Rebecca. Just kidding! It’s Alice. But you know that. Just a little joke. To break the um… ice? Not that you seem cold! I mean…” Wade sticks around a while to watch them while they work, enjoying their humiliation. Alice makes a good-natured crack about paying their dues on the first day, but Valentina challenges Wade’s presence, politely suggesting that surely she has something better to do than stand around and watch them at this. Wade, nastily: “I don’t give a shit who you are outside’a this place. In here? We got our own way of doing things. And in Yard Three? That way is my way.” Valentina, unfazed: “I see.”

Promo mugshot for Wade.

Later, Alice and Valentina dump a wheelbarrow full of pig poop onto a compost heap. They wash off a bit at a nearby water spigot and sit down to take a breather, where they’re joined by Ammo and the woman Melody was picking on earlier. Ammo introduces her as Graciela, saying that she’s a little “touched,” but she’s “good people.” Rather meaningfully, she says it’s important to have a buddy here, someone to watch your back. She thanks Val for her support earlier. Val says she was happy to help.

Shyly, Graciela gives the two newcomers an orange apiece. (Apparently they missed lunch as they were arriving.) After peeling hers, Valentina pulls it apart and offers half back to Graciela, who grins and accepts it. The four of them talk about the upcoming competition. Yard Three is desperate to get off the bottom rung of the chore assignment list, which includes all of the dirtiest, grossest jobs imaginable on the farm. Ammo drops a pointed hint, looking right at Valentina, that not everyone in their yard is happy with Wade’s leadership, and that all it takes is a simple majority to choose a new leader. Val: “Well. We’ll just have to see about that, won’t we?”

It’s competition time and Alice and Valentina join the rest of Yard Three in a field that has been set up as an obstacle course. Josie, the leader of Yard Five trash talks the two newest members of Yard Three, but she shakes hands with Valentina in a display of surprisingly good sportsmanship. Alice notices that each “Yard” is distinguished by a different color of coveralls. (Five is kind of a khaki color, Three is blue, etc.) From the assembled colors, there look to be at least six or seven different yards. Officer Miller comes over to wish Valentina good luck.

The competition is a complicated, eight-part relay race involving tests of strength, dexterity, wits and speed. As Yard Leader, Wade must assign her teammates to each leg of the race. Ammo suggests that Alice and Valentina get the brainiac leg of the race (putting together a small 3-D puzzle) but Wade, resenting the implication that Valentina is smarter than her, takes that job for herself and one of her cronies, and puts Alice and Valentina on the important final leg: racing through a mud pit three-legged race style and then digging through a large plastic kiddie pool full of sludge, to look for marbles. The first team to find three marbles of their own yard’s color wins.

Warden Elder appears, giddy with excitement, and kicks the whole thing off, shooting a pistol into the air. Things start out okay for Yard Three, with Ammo finishing second in the push-ups leg (Who knew?), and Melody barreling through a guard in a padded gladiator outfit on a narrow balance beam. Likewise with the next few legs ? until Wade and her partner lose a huge amount of time trying to put together her puzzle, setting their team back. Finally, it’s down to Alice and Valentina. From the sidelines, Wade snarls at them to move their asses. They eat it big time once, Alice coming up with a face full of mud, but working together, they make it through quickly. Still, Wade’s delay has hurt them: by the time they get to the kiddie tub, they are the last team there. And Josie already has two marbles for Yard Five. Alice finds a blue marble right off the bat, shrieking with glee. But then Josie finds a third, winning first place for her team. Valentina finds a second blue one, and a moment later, a third. Second place. Not too shabby! The women of Yard Three crowd around Alice and Val, slapping them on the back and crowing in excitement, celebrating. Wade glares at them, looking fit to kill, but says nothing.

There’s no time to shower before dinner, so the filthiest competitors are taken over to a nearby greenhouse to be hosed off. As Alice waits in line with Valentina, someone standing next to her greets a friendly looking guy carrying a tray of baby plants. The guy, Alfredo, introduces himself to Alice and Val and Alice suddenly twigs to what he’s holding. Alice: “That isn’t ? that can’t be…” She looks around to see if the guards are looking. Alfredo: “Chill, girl. It’s cool.” Alice and Val follow him a few paces into the greenhouse, and as the door is opened, Alice gasps: the greenhouse is full of pot plants. Alfredo: “Ladies, you are looking at the pride of Humboldt State Farm and Prison for Women. This is our medical marijuana growhouse.” Alice: “No. Fucking. Way.” He laughs and shoos them back into line.

Later, at dinner, Al and Val sit with Ammo, Graciela and several other women from their yard. Alice notices Josie from Yard Five enter the mess hall. Josie and Val meet each other’s eyes and nod a greeting. Wade sees this too, and a look of suspicion and anger clouds her face. She and her cronies step up to Alice and Val’s table. Wade, her voice low: “I bet you think you’re real clever, pulling something like that off on your first day here.” Val, calmly: “We were just discussing the political organization of our little group here. It seems there are some who take issue with your leadership. I am put in the position of having to decide whether or not to take that leadership from you.” Wade splutters with indignation. Val: “Wouldn’t you like to know what decision I’ve made? Or perhaps you’re clever enough to figure that out all on your own.” Wade is displeased to discover that half of her yard is backing Val. And then she notes the uncomfortable expression on Alice’s face. Wade, to Al, menacingly: “What about you, Freshie? Looks like you’re the swing vote.” Alice, horrified: “Me? No. Nonononono. I don’t wanna, you know, hurt anybody’s feelings here. You guys decide.” A guard starts toward them, hand on her baton at her belt. Wade says this isn’t over, but leaves with her gang. Ammo and the others glare at Alice. Al: “What?!” Val seems nonplussed.

Aaaand we’re back to Alice in the shower, getting smacked around by Wade. Wade: “You will back me for yard leadership. You will jump when I say fucking jump.” Alice whimpers, nodding frantically, when suddenly something twines around Wade’s throat, pulling tight. Val is strangling Wade with a bed sheet twisted around like a rope. Melody lets go of Alice and starts toward Val, but Val hisses a low warning. Val: “Are you sure you want to do that?” Melody freezes, her face reddening. She’s afraid of Val. Meanwhile, Wade is turning purple. Val, to Wade: “This isn’t personal. This is business.” She twists the noose open and shoves Wade away from her, releasing her. Wade gasps for breath and steps toward Val again, about to charge. Val raises a finger in warning: “You do not want to make this personal.” Wade hesitates, Val beckons Alice to come to her. Val, to Wade: “And do keep your hands off of my friend, Alice. I find her company very… diverting.” She pulls Alice to her possessively. Alice suddenly seems to notice that Val is fully clothed, while the rest of them are bare-assed. She blushes. Wade makes no further move against Val, but she spits on the floor between them before she leaves, her crew following her out.

Alice, to Val: “Okay, seriously. Who are you? I mean, thank you, but… who the fuck are you?!” Val strokes Alice’s hair, regarding her thoughtfully. Then she grabs a fistful of Al’s hair, yanking Al’s face in close. “I am Valentina fucking Galindo,” she breathes, her eyes dangerous, her lips still smiling. She kisses Alice hungrily. Al’s eyes fly open in shock until she surrenders to the kiss. Val pulls back, pats her on the ass and walks away. Off Alice’s stunned expression, the same blank look we first saw on her face.

----------------------------------------------------

"Ilene says, in an interview given less than 10 days ago, that she is still looking for a home for the show, but given this leek, I'm thinking it's only a half-hearted effort.
And given that she also revealed that she'll be explaining what happened to Jenny in the L Word movie, I'm thinking Alice won't ever really take the hit for Jenny's demise." by aliceO from http://www.aliceschart.com

Interview with Marlee Matlin

by StuntDouble, June 15, 2009 on afterellen.com

According to her calculations, Marlee Matlin was exactly 21 years and 218 days old the night in 1987 that she won the Best Leading Actress Academy Award for her role in Children of a Lesser God and had to convince Academy Award producers to let her interpreter on stage with her.

She took home a Golden Globe that year too, and she remains the youngest woman to ever win a leading lady Oscar.

But Matlin's rise to fame began much earlier: When she was seven-years-old, Matlin's teacher at the Center on Deafness and the Arts approached her about starring in their stage production of The Wizard of Oz. "Would you like to be Dorothy?" her teacher asked. Matlin's response: "I am Dorothy."

Not long after, she won a competition for her essay, "If I Was A Movie Star."

If I was a movie star, I would ride in a limousine.

When I go out of the limousine I would give everyone my best autograph and I would let people take my picture. Ohhh, when I am on the stage I would give everyone my best smile.

I would have a huge house which would have mirrors all over. I would love when people would write me letters. I would love to send them back but it's hard to write all the people.

I would love to meet all movie stars! They are so nice!!

I want to make movies all my life!

I am the best!!!

Here's my autograph.

Matlin's new memoir, I'll Scream Later, tells of her journey from childhood thespian to Oscar-winner to television star. Rather than the typical Hollywood tell-all, Matlin's autobiography paints a picture of a plucky young woman who fought through stereotypes, childhood abuse, a tumultuous family life and an intense drug addiction to become one of the most respected actresses in Hollywood.

Her book is filled with uncommon grace and plenty of laughter as she recounts her early career as a film star; her transition to television as Tess Kaufman on Reasonable Doubts (1991-1993), a role which earned her two more Golden Globe nominations; her appearance in Seinfeld's subversive "Lip Reader" episode (1993); her role as the formidable Joey Lucas on The West Wing (2000-2006); her turn as a contestant on ABC's Dancing With The Stars (2008-2009); and, of course, the time she spent on the set of The L Word, playing spirited artist Jodi Lerner (2007-2009).

A passionate advocate for gay rights, Matlin recently answered questions from us about her candid biography, her athletic prowess, how easy it is to kiss a woman, and why silence is the last thing the world will ever hear from her.

AfterEllen: The title of your book, I'll Scream Later, alludes to the fact that you were in rehab when you got the news that you'd been nominated for the Academy Award for Best Actress. Your interpreter, Jack, told you the press needed some kind of reaction, and you told him, "I'll scream later." It seems like such a feverish time in your life. Did you ever actually get the chance to celebrate and scream later?

Marlee Matlin: Actually, every day of sobriety for me is a celebration. I have a great family, I have a career. Had I not gotten sober, I don't even know if would have had a career after Children of A Lesser God, or even if I would be alive. It was really that bad for me. So each day is a wonderful celebration. As for "screaming later" I think the book is "later." I wanted the world to know that the time for silence was no more, that I couldn't keep silent about the abuse, the molestation, the drugs. But I also wanted to scream about my triumphs and my sobriety.

In some small way, I hoped that my story, my truth, could help someone who was saying "I'll scream later" because they didn't know how or have the tools to break the cycle of silence that comes with abuse, molestation and addiction.

AE: Your book starts off with you effectively closing the door on Hollywood after you won the Golden Globe for Best Leading Actress in a Drama. You checked into Betty Ford two days later, and almost no one supported you, not even your family. Do you look back now and just sort of marvel at the courage that took?

MM: That Marlee is a such a different person than who I am now. I want to give her a hug, then a kick in the ass and say, "You should've gotten yourself to rehab sooner." But we can only do what is right when the time feels right, so I guess I'd cut her some slack.

It wasn't about courage for me. It just felt right. I wasn't out to prove anything. I just wanted to get my life back.

AE: You said in rehab you started telling the "gritty parts" of your story — an image I love. What made you decide that now was the right time to write your autobiography, to share the gritty parts with the world?

MM: There were two factors that led me to write the book and all the "gritty" parts. First was that little show called Dancing with the Stars. As a result of being on that show, I got so many letters telling me I was an inspiration — the fact that I danced without hearing the music. It got to the point that every week it was all people were saying about me, and I wanted them to know that I was more than just that.

It was probably, too, the fact that I was playing myself on the show, and opening up, that I realized I hadn't had the chance to tell people who I really was, but if I did, perhaps they'd be inspired by the other things I had overcome in my life than simply my deafness.

The second factor that motivated me to write the book was watching my daughter turn 13. She was the same age as I was when I began to use drugs and suffer the molestation, and I instantly reflected back. I knew the only way she would not experience what I had experienced was if I told the truth, came clean, put it all on the table.

Yes, it wasn't pretty and no mom wants to look bad in front of her children, but she had to know what I went through so she could know what to avoid. You can't preach if you don't come clean with what you're preaching about, and I am so glad she knows. The truth can only empower, I believe.

AE: You talk a bit in your book about your abusive relationship with William Hurt and the molestation your suffered as child from a babysitter and a teacher. Where did you get the courage to speak out about it so truthfully?

MM: The biggest obstacle to overcoming abuse and molestation is keeping silent about it. Everyone who experiences it probably thinks it's only happening to them and to talk about it would be so shameful and destructive. But the only person that is being destroyed by the silence is themselves. Talking about it can potentially help the next person — and the person after that — to get out, to make the call, to get some help.

As I've always said, "Silence is the last thing the world will ever hear from me."

AE: You claim to be a sports fanatic, actually boasting that placing a bat in your hand is a promise of a couple of RBIs. I checked up on you because you played in the Taco Bell All Star Legends and Celebrity Softball game last year, and this does not look like the best way to maintain your RBI average. How do you explain yourself?

MM: Hey, if I see a nice butt, I've got to check it out. And isn't his name "Goose Gossage"? I gave him a little goose, that's all!

AE: Actually, you scored a run and had two RBIs, and I'm only bringing that up so I can post a picture of you in your uniform, because look how cute you are! In your book you mention that the Deaf community has often been torn in their support of your career. Sometimes you sign, sometimes you speak. It just depends on need of the character and the writing of the show, yet everyone seems to have an opinion about what is best for the Deaf community. Is that still a struggle for you?

MM: It's not a struggle; it just is what it is. I'm an actor, but I'm also human. I can't be everyone's answer to making everything right in the world just because the world has historically not understood people who are Deaf. I've learned I'm just one of many, and that whatever people want to put on me belongs to them, not me. All I can do is speak out on what I believe and hope that it will be considered. I don't have to be liked or loved by everyone, and I certainly hope that everyone respects my opinion as I would theirs.

At 43, I've learned to let it just slide off my back (unless they're talking about my kids, and then I get in their faces). I've mellowed out — a lot.

AE: I think Seinfeld's "Lip Reader" episode is iconic. Did you catch any flak for taking on that role?

MM: The only thing I got for taking on that role was an Emmy nomination and a lot of approving looks, from people in airports, on the freeway, in public restrooms while I was freshening up! People across the board loved the episode and why wouldn't they? It was SEINFELD for God's sake, probably one of the top one or two funniest sitcoms in history. I am so honored to have been a small part of its legacy.

And I am so jazzed to be working and developing a half-hour comedy with the creator of "Lip Reader," Carol Leifer. Funny lady!

AE: The only inhibitions you mention in your book about joining The L Word were that there were nude scenes and that it was a pretty racy departure from your previous roles. Did you have any other qualms about tackling the character of Jodi Lerner?

MM: Well other than the fact that I'd never had to do an actual full frontal nude scene, my only real qualm was being away from my family for four months out of the year to film the show. At first it was hard to adjust, and I was flying home nearly every weekend to be with my kids.

But fortunately, shooting was in the summer when the kids were busy having fun and hardly ever at home (mostly with Grandma or at the swim club). When fall came around and school started, it was a problem too as I wanted to be there for their first days.

But the producers were GREAT in letting me go down for days, and I never really felt like I missed out on important milestones in their lives. By the third season, it was a routine we had slipped into and those initial concerns seemed far away.

AE: You actually asked Ilene Chaiken to name your character "Jodi," right? After a friend of yours?

MM: Yes, one member of a lesbian couple I had known from my daughter's school was named Jodi. She died too soon of heart failure and Reiter's Syndrome, a form of arthritis, and I wanted to honor her. She was a fantastic woman, wife and mom.

AE: Obviously, I've got to ask you about this quote from your book:

I have to admit I've found it so much easier to kiss a woman than a man. I love men and I am a huge flirt, and with cute, handsome guys, well, I can get nervous about that kiss. Make no mistake, I am absolutely in love and committed to my wonderful husband. But that electricity that comes with a first kiss with someone attractive and new, well, I may be married, but I'm still human.

Do you want to unpack that statement? Because what I'm hearing you say is "Jennifer Beals is an awesome kisser."

MM: Unpack. Ha. I love that. But actually there's not much luggage there. Jennifer Beals is hot. Simple as that. I had no qualms about kissing her. One, because we were friends and had been for 20 years, so I knew there wouldn't be any judgments based on her not knowing who I was. Second, because we were familiar with each other. And in acting it's so much easier to work with what you know than what you don't know.

With a lot of male actors in love scenes, it's all about choreography because each of us has different working parts, if you know what I mean, and you're never sure how your male costar likes to approach things. With a woman, it's just easier. You both know where everything is and you can focus on the other stuff in the scene — the passion, etc.

With Jennifer I never had to worry about the physical part, I could focus on the acting. With a lot of male costars it was completely the opposite and thus much more difficult to feel as if I did it right.

AE: Are you glad to have spent three seasons with the show? Any regrets?

MM: My only regret was that we didn't have the opportunity to explore Jodi's life a lot more in the same way the other characters lives were explored. Who were her friends, what brought her to where she was on the show? By the last season we saw only small glimpses of her and I think a lot of the viewers felt conflicted about her. I loved the scenes that showed Jodi interacting with the other characters like Shane but unfortunately there weren't enough.

Maybe if there's an L Word movie and Jodi is in it. Hint, hint, Ilene? Ha!

AE: What's your take on the current state of same-sex marriage rights in the U.S.?

MM: Anyone regardless of their sexual preference should be able to MARRY whomever they want. Period. Asking gays and lesbians to accept any less (i.e. civil unions) is not equal. I respect and understand people's opinions that marriage is between a man and a woman, but why do their opinions have to prevent two people, regardless of their sexual preference, from getting married?

As my pal Whoopi Goldberg said, "If they don't like gay marriage, don't marry one!" What does it have to do with them? It's just a matter of time before it'll be available everywhere but in the meantime, we all have the right to speak up about the injustice of marriage inequality and try and help make the change come sooner.

AE: At the age of seven, when your teacher at the Center on Deafness and the Arts asked you if you wanted to play Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, you said, "I am Dorothy." Are there any other roles you've taken on where you just felt like, "I am this character"?

MM: I tackle every character with gusto; that's just who I am. There have been times when I didn't feel comfortable with what I was doing because I may have taken the role simply for the money (all actors have those moments) but more times than not, I have embraced each character I have played and learned to live in their shoes.

It's my favorite thing about acting and I can't imagine doing anything else.

AE: In your book you tell a story about going on a helicopter ride as a child, even though you were terrified. You said, "Often the 'thing', whatever it was, that I feared the most turned into something I loved."

You've won a Golden Globe and an Academy Award; you've done comedy, drama and cartoons to lavish praise from critics; you've written books; you've performed the "Star Spangled Banner" at the Super Bowl; you've danced beautifully with the Stars, and now even have your own star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame; you have four wonderful children; and you've made out with Jennifer Beals. Are there still fears in your life you have to break through, or at this point have you pretty much conquered the world?

MM: The fears I have left in my life have to do with overcoming my own insecurities about myself, but I'm working on them. I still consider myself a very shy person in many situations and I'd like to change that. I also have fears of certain things that have to do with loss of control: fear of horses (they're so big and I'm afraid I can't control them); fear of small spaces (claustrophobia that goes back to the William Hurt experience). Again, they have to do with a feeling that I have no control. I'm working on those but mostly I am a fearless person when it comes to acting.

I want to tackle every role that's out there, regardless of whether they see a Deaf person in it or not. Where there's a will there's a way. Really the only handicap I face is not my inability to hear but what people think it is I can't do.

Once I overcome that, I can do anything. (Well, except sing the "Star Spangled Banner"... but I can sign it!)

Monte Carlo TV Festival 2009

Ilene and Kate at the Monte Carlo TV Festival:

More pictures you can find in Kates gallery.

Ilene is writing a TLW Movie

by Twitter

That's your second chance, Ilene, to present us a wonderful, lovely, amazing, respectfully, dignifiedly and dreamlike TLW end. Or, only that you don't understand the TLW fans all over the world, in one sentence:

We want a wonderful, mawkishly Happyend!!!

Leisha Hailey goes to Lifetime

by Trish Bendix from www.afterellen.com

AfterEllen.com reader Helen tipped us off that Leisha Hailey recently appeared in the Lifetime mini-series Maneater. Based on the name, we realize most of you probably weren't into watching it, so I did the job for you. (You're welcome.)

Sarah Chalke (Scrubs) plays Clarissa, a spoiled Hollywood socialite who ends up pregnant and broke based on her poor life decisions and karma. She doesn't befriend Leisha's character Harriet until she moves into a smaller house in a humble section of Los Angeles, and Harriet lives next door.

She kind of looks like Alanis Morissette circa 1996, doesn't she?

Hailey's Harriet doesn't appear until the second part of the mini-series (which aired in two parts over Memorial Day weekend and can now be watched in its entirety online), where she is seen as the doudy do-gooder by all of Clarissa's well-to-do BFFs (played by Marla Sokoloff and Judy Greer).

OK, so Maneater sucks, but it's always fun to watch Leisha play a character completely different than she's played before. And going from the high class lesbian Alice to a cosmetic-free social worker with unkempt long locks, it's entertaining to see Hailey acting as someone that's supposed to be unattractive and straight.

I'm not too shocked Leisha was talking up this role and sending out Tweets to Uh Huh Her fans to check out the show. But I guess it's good she's still working, since The Farm is no longer.

Next up? I hope to see Hailey with a better haircut.

Doctors Without Borders - LaurelHolloman.net

by www.LaurelHolloman.net

As the officially endorsed site of Laurel Holloman, we are proud to be able to help Laurel raise money for one of her favorite charities, Doctors Without Borders. In addition to Laurel's birthday (May 23rd) and the holidays, we'd like to encourage you to donate to these charities as often as you wish. We have set up an account where you can donate securely to this charity. To make a donation click here or the picture.

Doctors Without Borders Médecins Sans Frontières (MSF) is an international independent medical humanitarian organization that delivers emergency aid to people affected by armed conflict, epidemics, natural and man-made disasters, and exclusion from health care in more than 70 countries. A private, nonprofit organization, Doctors Without Borders was founded in 1971 as the first non-governmental organization to both provide emergency medical assistance and bear witness publicly to the plight of people it assists.

Maybe we can help Laurel too!!!

Ebay Auction - Would you like to have Jennifer's camera?

End time of the auction: 01-Jun-09 17:12:36 EDT

The auction for Jennifer's camera has started at Exposed! DOXA’s Celebrity Camera Auction. The auction will end on June 1st. For more information click here and go to ebay!

Clementine Ford Confirms Relationship with Linda Perry

by StuntDouble from afterellen.com

This week's Soap Opera Digest magazine features an interview with out actress Clementine Ford, in which she opens up about her move to daytime television, her girlfriend and why talking about being gay on a soap opera is like asking what it's like to be straight in a dentist's office. (Answer: "It's just my life.")

While Ford doesn't find the news about her sexuality to be all that noteworthy, she was warm and open about her relationship with singer/songwriter Linda Perry, telling Soap Opera Digest.

Every time I do an interview, she asks, 'Did you mention me?' We go to events together and we don't try to hide anything. We're just a couple. We're both like, "I can't wait to show you off."

The couple had a chance to do just that at last month's charity event, An Evening with Women, which was spearheaded by Perry herself.

Ford and Perry showing one another off at the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center's An Evening With Women in April

You're probably familiar with Linda Perry, even if you think you're not. In addition to being a popular singer in the late '90s, Perry has written and produced some me ga-hits for current recording artists, including Pink's "Get This Party Started," Gwen Stefani's "What Are You Waiting For?," Alicia Keys' "Superwoman" and a half-dozen chart-toppers for Christina Aguilera, including her gay-inclusive hit song "Beautiful."

"It's funny," Ford told Soap Opera Digest, "[Linda's] enormously more well-known than I am."

Maybe not for long.

Almost as much has been made of Ford's leap to daytime television as it has of her coming out. In April she joined that cast of CBS daytime drama The Young and the Restless as the fourth incarnation of Mackenzie Browning, ex-wife and maybe-cousin of Billy Abbott.

Ford told Soap Opera Digest that she shut down her agent when he first mentioned meeting with Y&R producers, but when he finally convinced her to sit down with them, she was sold. She said her friends gave her conflicting advice about joining the show, but her mom supports anything she wants to do in terms of work, and all the haters "can suck it."

Prior to beginning work on Y&R, Ford told The Advocate that joining such an established cast was "nerve-wracking," much like walking onto The L Word set, but that she knew things would be easier once she "hit her stride."

Apparently she's found that pace. "Soaps is actor bootcamp," she told Soap Opera Digest. "You learn about lighting, being prepared and knowing where to stand. You have to be on."

The article touches on what it was like growing up with a mom like Cybill Shepherd ("Her sense of humor is way out there, while mine can be dark and dry. But I can do a pratfall with the best of them."), on getting her coming-out haircut ("My hair was really long and blonde for years but I wanted to be free from that, so I cut it."), and on how she got her name ("My Darling Clementine. It's different but it's classic!").

Ford briefly mentions her character from The L Word, saying she really likes and misses Molly's toughness tempered with her vulnerability.

Mostly, though, it appears that Ford isn't looking backwards — not to her highly-publicized and much-debated coming out or at her former accomplishments as the daughter of Cybill Shepherd. She's in a relationship with Linda Perry and enjoying every day of boot camp — just another actress, out in Hollywood.

You can read the full interview with Clementine Ford in this week's Soap Opera Digest, the one with Secrets!, Murder Shocker! and Tragedy! on the cover. (Oh, that's not a unique description? OK, it's the one from May 26.)

TimesTalks with Ilene Chaiken and Jennifer Beals – April 20, 2009

By BetteAndTinaForever from l-word.com - A special Thanks for this wonderful detailed report

Some call me “dedicated fan”, some call me “crazy lunatic” and there are some who call me all kinds of names that I can’t put in this report. I prefer to be called a dedicated fan, though I’ll admit to some craziness. Before I report about the TimesTalks event in New York, let me tell you what happened on my journey there.

Turbulence or Fear of Flying

I know some of you might not want to read this part because it’s about my journey to New York…believe me, it wasn’t fun for me to write this either because I was doing it while I was in the air.

On Saturday, April 18, I went to the GLAAD Awards in Los Angeles as a reporter for the l-word.com. Initially, I planned to fly to New York right after the GLAAD event and attend the TimesTalks. Then I found out about Mia Kirshner’s Benefit event in Los Angeles on April 22 that Jennifer Beals and Laurel Holloman were planning to attend. I wanted to go to that event as well but I wasn’t sure if I could manage three events in such a short time, especially if I had to fly back and forth across the country, and expect to be employed I got back!

I decided to cancel the New York trip and go to the LA events instead. A day before leaving for the GLAAD Awards, I found out that Mia’s benefit was canceled but I had already made all the flight changes and I didn’t want to deal with making changes again for New York. And then something happened at the GLAAD Awards that made me change my mind …and that something was Jennifer Beals.

When she approached me on the red carpet and before we got to the actual interview, Jennifer asked me if I was coming to New York and I explained that I had to cancel that trip to go to Mia’s benefit, which was also canceled. We began talking about other things and doing the interview but when it was over and Jennifer was ready to leave, I asked if it was okay for me to come to New York. Jennifer replied that she would be disappointed if I wasn’t there. Even if it was a joke I realized that I couldn’t say no to Jennifer Beals, so I decided to rearrange my flights again to go to New York.

I flew home from LA on Sunday and Monday morning I was back at the airport. As fate would have it, my plane to JFK was delayed for two hours due to bad weather on the East coast. Imagine my frustration and despair. I had to fly five hours each way just to get to a two hour event in New York and I might not even make it. I guess that’s the crazy part of me.

Luckily, there was another flight to Newark that was leaving an hour before my original flight and it had one seat available. It was in the back of the plane by the restrooms and, of course, a bunch of crying kids but at least it was getting me closer to New York. I exchanged my ticket, got on the plane and then found out that it was also delayed but now I was stuck inside the aircraft on the runaway, not knowing when we were leaving. So maybe I wasn’t as lucky as I thought.

So here I was, exhausted from the previous trip, sitting on the plane bound for Newark, waiting for our departure and hoping that I’d get to New York on time for the event.

Finally we were in the air and at that point all I wanted was just to get to New York because the flight was long and the turbulence was bad. When we reached the East coast there was another delay landing and we were stuck in the sky above Pennsylvania. For almost an hour we were making circles accompanied by turbulence…I don’t know how many because I stopped counting after the fifth circle when half of the plane became sick and searched for the motion sickness bags.

After we finally left the circles of hell, the plane began to descend in a weird pattern. After we landed, I looked at the yellow trace on a moving map on my TV screen and it looked like the pilot was trying to spell The L Word.

When we finally landed, I spent another 30 minutes waiting to get off the plane. Everyone who needed to make connections was already late so they didn’t care and I was almost jumping out of my skin because I couldn’t stand idle for another moment.

Finally, I was free, running down the terminals and stairs to get to my shuttle. Little did I know that my adventures were not over yet! Because I flew to another airport the super shuttle had a van available for me only in another 30 minutes and I had to share it with other passengers. So I was warned right away that I wouldn’t make it in time if they needed to be dropped first. My best chance was a taxi.

At that point I didn’t care that it was three times more expensive. I was in New York already and I had a little over an hour to get to Times Square or the whole thing would be for nothing. I kept running in the rain, searching for a taxi stand. It was like an episode from “Amazing Race.” There was no line, so I quickly pre-paid, jumped inside the next free taxi and yelled, “Go, go, go…here’s the address where I have to be by 8 pm.”

The driver was really nice and even listened to my explanation as to why I was in such a hurry. I looked like a mad woman, literally. I was running in the rain so I was wet, sweaty, breathing hard and speaking in short sentences because my English always gets worse when I’m nervous or tired…and I was both.

To make this long story short, the driver knew what he was doing and got me to Times Square by 7:30 pm. I made it! I went inside and nobody was in yet because they had another talk going on until 8 pm. I met a few nice fans and spent time chatting with them. When I finally got inside, all the front middle rows were taken; it looked like I’d probably sit somewhere on the edge. But, alas, a couple of very nice girls, who had one seat available in the second row right in front of the stage, offered me a seat. I was very close and right where Jennifer ended up sitting so I had a very good view.

Conversation with Ilene and Jennifer

New York Times Live is a very interesting live event which is held year round at TheTimeCenter, including TimesTalks. “Life after the L Word” with Ilene and Jennifer was a really exciting event and I don’t regret even for a moment that I had to endure the worst flight ever to get to New York so I could hear Jennifer and Ilene talk to the fans.

The moderator, Kim Severson, is a staff writer for the dining section of The New York Times and she was really great with her questions. She at least was someone who watched the show and knew what she was talking about.

Before I describe their conversation and the Q&A part, I’d like to go back to the story about Jennifer practically inviting me to go to New York. I said that even if it was a joke, I still decided to go because no one in their right mind would say no to Jennifer Beals. As it turned out, it wasn’t a joke because when Jennifer came onto the stage and saw me in the audience, she smiled and said, “I’m glad you made it.”

Later, after the event was over, I saw Kim the moderator leaving the building and I approached her to thank her for a great evening and she told me she’d heard about me from Jennifer. Jennifer told Kim about me and said she hoped I’d make it to New York. So you see, it wasn’t a joke and I’m really glad I went.

The audio for the entire talk will be posted in the podcast section of TimesTalks (http://www.nytimes.whsites.net/talk/podcasts.html) so I’ll only mention highlights of their conversation. It’s not verbatim and might be out of order but I wrote this to the best of my ability.

- At the beginning when the guests sat down, Kim said: “I think I can speak for everyone here…Ilene, what the hell?” (She was talking about season six, of course, and Ilene was laughing while Jennifer made a gesture as if she was stabbing her. It was funny). Jennifer said that she talked to Ilene about it because the Disney part of Jennifer wanted the show to be a celebration of friendship. It was very hard for her to tough through it but she had to work with what Ilene gave her. Ilene has a dark side according to Jennifer; and she did the finale to the best of her ability but then she would go back to her trailer and go, “Why? Why?” Jennifer was really upset over the ending.

- After that they talked about the movie because Ilene said it was a possibility and Jennifer mentioned that the movie would be great but she’ll only do it if it’s a celebratory, happy movie about love and friendship. Ilene replied that there’s a big amount of interest and support for the idea of the movie and they all would like to do it.

- Ilene said that she would like nothing more than to work with Jennifer again and they both mentioned that they are working on a very exciting project together that in some way is a continuation of The L Word. They wouldn’t reveal what it is but said we’ll find out soon. (I think it might be related to the coming out stories that they were going to collect on OurChart before it’s untimely demise).

- Ilene always thought that she was a solitary writer until she began doing The L Word but then she had a group of women who wouldn’t let her be solitary. They were all socially communicative and it turned out to be a great collaboration. Ilene was talking about cast members, of course. She said that they would always go to her with their ideas for stories or the characters and all the cast members at some point were asking Ilene to change things in their storylines.

Jennifer stepped in and said that she was the least demanding of them all. She also said that though Ilene was the head writer, she made it clear to the cast that the door was always open for them. Jennifer joked then that she didn’t think Ilene could have ever imagined the door would become this much of a revolving door because everyone was constantly offering their own ideas. Ilene added that there were moments when it would become a little wild but it was also a really great collaboration. She said that Jennifer collaborated with her the most and they constantly talked about the storylines and character development. Often cast members would come to Ilene with issues about their character being “out of character” or just to express ideas for a story.

- Ilene said that after Queer as Folks was produced, she brought up the subject of the lesbian show once again and this time she got a green light. She told Showtime she was grateful for their support and that they would get some interesting, significant and well-known actresses who wouldn’t be afraid to play these characters. They had a very short list for Bette because she was deemed the main character and Jennifer Beals was on that list. Ilene said that if they could get Jennifer they would be there already.

- Jennifer told her side of the story. She had just been offered a show where she was going to play a prostitute. She met with the executives from that show and then literally the same day she met with Ilene and Larry and some others to talk about The L Word. After that meeting Jennifer thought, “Hmm…do I want to be a prostitute or a lesbian?” She saw the potential for the show and Ilene had some great ideas. Then Jennifer met Rose Troche who was so passionate, intelligent and very engaging; Jennifer realized then that she would be a part of something very special and the choice was easy.

- Kim mentioned Pam Grier and Ilene and Jennifer told a short story of how Pam’s character in the original pilot was someone else. Her name was also Kit but she wasn’t Bette’s sister, she was this wacky sea captain. Jennifer was laughing really hard at that, by the way. The Showtime executives loved the Pilot and said that they would pick up the show but they were not sure if Pam’s character was working. Ilene was glad but she also really wanted to keep Pam on the show so they decided to create a character just for her. In the original Pilot Jennifer and Pam did an incredible scene together and they were so connected. Ilene looked at them and decided to make them sisters.

- Laurel Holloman was cast opposite Jennifer after they narrowed it down to two actresses who would play Tina. Both actresses had already done their auditions and now they needed to see them with Jennifer. Jennifer was working on a movie at the time and the actresses went to her trailer and their conversations were filmed to see who had more chemistry with Jennifer.

- Kim asked about the Laurel/Jennifer chemistry and their love scenes. Jennifer laughed and said that she read somewhere on the Internet that people have all these fantasies that they are lovers in real life. (Everyone cheered and she just laughed). Jennifer then said that in their love scenes they had to trust each other completely. In the love scenes that they had, they were very intense, especially the one at the end of season one and Jennifer said that she trusts Laurel implicitly. They had each other’s backs, literally. If they had a part of their body that they were not comfortable with, they would always ask the other person to cover it.

- Jennifer also said that in the Pilot she was so focused on Bette’s work that when it came time to do a love scene she was like, “Oh my God, I’m a lesbian. What am I supposed to do? I’m going to be this ugly hetero person who doesn’t have a clue…can I google something?” Laurel asked her if she wanted maybe a glass of wine and Jenifer thought it was just crazy, until she realized that it was just a scene like any other scene. It wasn’t just a love scene, it was a scene about two people who have been disconnected and it was a way for them to reunite. They choreographed everything and they actually had to re-shoot that scene. Jennifer brought in a love scene that she liked and Laurel also brought one that she liked, and they all shared ideas with Rose Troche who was directing. In the end they all came up with something more substantial and more specific that the one they had before (we call it The Pilot Sex).

- Kim asked if they could share some juicy details from the set, like arguments or fights…Jennifer said that they were like family and it’s not like people didn’t argue but she didn’t want to share because she considers them all a family. Ilene said that they had some highs and some lows, and there were moments of great collaboration and moments when someone would disagree with something. Jennifer added that it was definitely a different set from what she is used to. People always talked to one another and if they had a problem with something, whether a scene or someone else, it was addressed very quickly. Jennifer said that she felt so “heard” on the set in a way she had never been before.

- Jennifer mentioned her film “Book of Eli” that just finished filming and said it was an amazing experience. She attributed it to the fact that the Hughes brothers are biracial and were raised by a lesbian. Jennifer said that she felt lucky to have two such great experiences. Kim added that the movie industry is not really known for that kind of thing and Jennifer said that it has a very monolithic, patriarchal structure where your voice often isn’t heard as a woman.

- Kim made a comment that it was probably a challenge getting back into the real world after The L Word. Jennifer joked, “Oh yes, I talked to Kate Moennig recently and I said, ‘What would you give to have just one more scene at the Planet, talking over a cup of coffee?’”

- Kim asked Ilene if she ever started out to change the culture in America because she did, in Kim’s opinion. Ilene said, “I didn’t.” Kim, “Oh, you did.” And then Kim asked if Ilene started out by saying, “This is my life’s political work” or “I have an idea…” Ilene replied that she didn’t start out by saying that she was going to change culture or do something political, she started out by saying that she wanted to tell some great stories and entertain people and if it worked, then great. The show came out in the midst of a cultural change and it was thrilling to be part of it but she would never go on saying that that’s what she planned all along.

- Jennifer said that she herself didn’t watch a lot of television and she had no idea that The L Word was the first of its kind. When they were dealing with the press, Ilene told Jennifer that it wasn’t political but Jennifer thought that it was personal and, therefore, political. She went on to say that if there was a young girl in the middle of nowhere, with no access to a larger community and this show helped her to see herself represented, then that was a wonderful thing. Then Jennifer paused to collect herself because she was almost on the verge of tears, “And if that’s political then I felt very political.” She added that giving someone an opportunity to be authentic, to be heard and to let others hear your true voice is incredibly important.

- Kim asked Jennifer if, as a Yale graduate, she knew a lot about LGBT issues or if being on the show had opened her eyes and Jennifer said that the show had completely opened her eyes because she learned what a “twink” and “dental dam” were…after everyone stopped laughing she added that seriously, one important thing that she learned was that we are all connected. The “gay issues” are also women issues because homophobia is a form of misogyny. She is more motivated now to speak out if she sees something she doesn’t like. And Jennifer also said that she can see now how all women are connected because we are either repressed or repress ourselves and that’s codified in our culture.

- Kim asked Ilene how she developed a think skin because she was criticized a lot. Even the lesbian community expressed dislike for: the women being too pretty, too much sex, or not enough sex or Max with beard who is a girl and other issues. Ilene replied that it developed over time. In reality, if people are engaged on all levels, when they get angry, when they are debating or even hurling something at you, it means that the show was successful. If no one cared then the show wouldn’t have been on the air for six years.

- Kim made a comment that it was a remarkable run and brought up a few other shows, like Queer as Folk, Will and Grace, Ellen; and all these shows were coming out when America was more comfortable with gay characters. Ilene said that she certainly hadn’t dreamed that some day she would do a show about lesbians and Ellen DeGeneres definitely laid down some major stones, even though it wasn’t necessarily good for her at that time. Now she owns the world. In 2004 the world was also ready for a lesbian show.

- Ilene mentioned again that she first pitched it in 2001 when she had written an article for a Los Angeles magazine about the gay and lesbian baby boom. Her twins were two years old and she looked around and saw lots and lots of lesbians in Los Angeles having babies; it was a phenomena. She wanted to tell stories about it and to make a show about it. She went to Showtime because she had already worked with them on another project and she thought that maybe they would be receptive to her ideas. She presented an article and mentioned that she would like to do an ensemble drama about lesbians. She was kindly rejected.

- Six months later Showtime bought the rights for Queer as Folk and they put it on the air. And Ilene approached them and said, “You have a show about gay men, what about lesbians?” And they said, “You’re right.” The world was some how opening the doors for them to tell their stories. And now, with it finished, it will be harder to produce another show like this. Economic reasons are part of it but also it’s still harder to sell a project with a gay character.

- Kim replied that it seems weird that there are hardly any gay characters on television. Ilene said that it’s very sad. Jennifer and she actually talk about it all the time because they had believed that after The L Word ended, there would be many shows like it. She finds it very sad that we find ourselves in a cultural desert with no representation of our lives in the culture.

- The next subject that Kim brought up involved the social issues that the show tackled that were not mainly LGBT issues like substance abuse, race, adoption, breast cancer. Ilene said that they were using many issues that one could face in life because they wanted to deliver a message that our lives are just like the lives of everyone else, we are all dealing with the same things, no matter if we are gay or straight.

- Biracial issues were addressed and Jennifer said that originally Bette was written as white. During their first reading Jennifer said to Ilene that she wanted to be represented as a biracial lesbian and Ilene was very open to it.

- Next question was to name a few scenes or episodes that they were especially proud of. Ilene said that she couldn’t really do it but she confessed being a Bette fan and loving all the scenes when Bette was going on a rant. Jennifer said that one of her favorite scenes was the Bette and Tina fight/love scene at the end of season one. It was a very complicated and intense scene. Tony Goldwyn, who directed that episode, just let the cameras roll and they just kept doing that scene over and over. It was very exhausting but Jennifer felt that she had accomplished something important at the end. She was very proud of what they brought to that scene.

- Kim asked if Jennifer is a different actor now having been on The L Word and her reply was that she did change and become more vocal. She is more confident in expressing her opinions when she wants to understand the direction and development of her characters. Working on The L Word was an amazing experience, especially working with different directors, who were predominantly feature film or independent film directors. They were all very passionate about their work and involved in the re-writing process. Ilene added that it was a very unique situation because each episode was like a mini-movie.

- Kim mentioned again that it was probably hard for Ilene to give up some control and Ilene replied that she could be a control freak but she also liked the collaborative process because it was better to have people sharing their ideas about the storylines and Ilene always welcomed their input. She also admitted that often the ideas of others were much better than her original idea.

- Next subject of conversation was about things that Ilene regretted and Kim brought up one of the things that fans were always vocal about, killing Dana Fairbanks. Ilene said right away, “I’d like to rephrase it…I didn’t kill Dana Fairbanks. Dana got sick.” She then said that part of the fan’s anger was based on the fact that she killed a lesbian and Ilene’s reply always was, “I’m sorry but lesbians do die.” She also mentioned that during season one and two she was attacked for making Jenny Jewish. Ilene added that it was another thing that happened because of the actress, because Mia is Jewish and she suggested making Jenny Jewish, as well. Then Jenny turned crazy and fans were angry at Ilene for making a Jewish character crazy.

- Kim then brought up the question of Jenny being based on Ilene. Ilene replied that in the first season Jenny and Bette were two characters who were loosely based on her. Jenny presented her coming out experience, being a writer and Jewish. Bette represented her more mature experiences, being a career woman who tried to start a family, tried to keep a relationship working while having a very busy and big career. So, many of Ilene issues were reflected in these two characters. Over the seasons, the characters became so much themselves that Ilene no longer felt any kind of proprietary relationship with them. Ilene also added that at different moments she could relate to all the characters, just as the audience did.

- Kim then asked Jennifer about Bette and her development. She asked that since Jennifer is a photographer and has an aesthetic sense, was she using it when she portrayed Bette or was all of it given to her. Jennifer replied that everything was completely given to her. She knew nothing about painting and learned a lot while doing the show. Kim mentioned that she heard that the character of Bette was based on a friend of Ilene’s who has a gallery. Ilene said that she wouldn’t use word “based on” but there was a mutual friend who became an inspiration for Bette and helped them with some ideas about being an art museum director.

- The next subject was clothes for the show. Jennifer said she misses clothes from the show the most. Cynthia, their costume designer, was extraordinary and she got to know everyone’s taste and style and always listened to their input about the clothes that they wanted to wear. Jennifer added that she really misses her cufflinks. At the end of each season all the cast members were allowed to buy at a bargain price any part of their wardrobe they wanted, including clothes other characters were wearing. Sometimes there was a frenzy at the wardrobe room because everyone would be hiding things that they wanted. (Jennifer and Ilene were really funny during that sequence).

- The next subject was about the guest stars. Kim asked how they managed to get so many tremendous stars to appear and if any of the storylines were written for a specific guest. Ilene said that she attributes it to the fact that there are so few parts for women that are interesting and different, in which a woman’s character isn’t just part of the orbit of a man’s story. Another factor was that that a lot of actresses were just excited about being part of the show that talks about women in an interesting and self-determined way. Jennifer added that in the movie industry there’s often this old Victorian notion that a woman’s world is all about love and it’s just an episode in their life. She was doing a movie where her character brought up an affair in the middle of a crisis, asking her male partner if anyone knew about their affair. Her partner replied, “Oh, we have bigger issues now because we have to save the world.” And Jennifer said that she told the director that she couldn’t say that and she suggested, “Hey, why don’t you give the line to him, and I’ll say, ‘We have bigger issues’.” (This statement was met with a lot of applause and laughter.)

- They continued talking about the guest stars and Kim mentioned Cybill Shepherd. Ilene said that usually they got calls from people who wanted to be on the show. She knew that Cybill wanted to be on The L Word and when they came up with the idea of Phyllis, Cybill was the first actress that they thought of for that role. Marlee Matlin was also the one who knew a lot of people and she would come to Ilene with new names of people who wanted to be a part of the show. Often agents or casting directors would call her.

- They only had a few minutes left before the Q&A and Kim asked about webisodes as an alternative avenue for delivering the show. Ilene explained that when they first went on the air, the web was relatively new in its relationship to television. In the beginning Ilene knew about people posting things online but she thought she didn’t have to listen to the fans.

- By the time the second season was out, she realized that she was dead wrong and that she needed to pay attention. She also realized that The L Word fans were a huge global community who connected on the Internet because it was a place for them to talk about the show and their lives. There had never been content like this before for lesbians and it was very important. OurChart was a response to that need as they created an on-line community for fans to gather and connect. OurChart didn’t work out because they had to do it with CBS and the big corporate structure made it impossible for them to grow the site in the way they wanted to.

- Showtime owns the L Word characters but they are very generous in letting Ilene continue their lives on the Internet and they are also very supportive of The L Word movie. This was when Jennifer said once again that she would only do it if Ilene would abandon her dark site and make a happy movie. Ilene basically promised that she will do a movie about love, romance and friendship…and she mentioned a wedding!

- More on webisodes and specific content for the web. Jennifer said that doing stuff for the web feels like a continuation of the storytelling process because for her, the story is paramount. And what was so exciting about The L Word, was that the stories they told encouraged other people within the community and outside the community to tell their own stories to one another. Jennifer was really disappointed when OurChart folded.

- She also said that she can’t read things on the Internet because she gets really upset. She read one comment when someone didn’t like her short hair and called her a soccer mom. But there were also moments that she really liked, like when she did a triathlon in September. She did it as a way to raise money for various charities, and also as a way to make sure she wouldn't quit. She read some of the comments on OurChart where people were so encouraging and so sweet and helped her a lot when she was doing the race.

- Ilene also mentioned a series of interviews that Jennifer did with Tobias Wolff during the presidential campaign. It was before Obama got the nomination, and it was an incredible dialogue that really brought a lot of people into the conversation. Jennifer agreed and said that she was able to ask him questions that the fans asked on OurChart and it was a great way for her to facilitate their conversation.

The conversation with Ilene and Jennifer lasted almost an hour and it was time now for questions from the audience. I didn’t ask any because I just had a short interview with Jennifer and Ilene at the GLAAD Awards and I wanted to hear what other fans wanted to know about. And honestly, I wanted to just enjoy my time and watch Jennifer answering the questions.

Q&A with Jennifer and Ilene

When Kim announced that there was time now for questions and answers, two lines of people formed by the microphones that were posted on the stairs. A lot of fans made a few comments and statements before asking their questions. There was even one man and a few straight women who stood to ask questions; it was another indication that the show reached a diverse group of people and not just lesbians.

One statement I liked in particular was when one woman said that though she was already out for over twenty years before the L Word came on TV; it was like coming out the second time. Because of the show she was more comfortable with herself and more comfortable talking about herself and her wife and her kids, and the people at work were more comfortable talking to her about it. So it’s not just young girls in Iowa coming out (she referred to a letter that some girl wrote to Jennifer) but it’s also all those people who were already out, coming out again because of the show.

Here’re a few questions that were asked that night. Again, they are not verbatim and I probably missed a few but I tried to write them as I remembered and from the notes I took.

Q. Initially I heard that season five was the last one and I was happy that there was season six but is there a reason why the show ended there?

A. (Ilene) Season five was never a last one but what happened was that every year when filming was finished, it wasn’t known if they were picked up by the network. After the season ran, they’d wait to hear from the network. When Showtime picked them up for the sixth season they said to Ilene, “We want to do a final season.” They’d been doing the show for five years at that point and she felt they’d said everything they needed to say, as well as they could say it and they wanted to go out while they were at their peak rather then when they flat lining.

Q. What is the purpose behind the interrogation tapes?

A. (Ilene) The interrogation tapes served a two-fold mission. Ilene wanted to address questions that fans asked on OurChart and at the same time she knew that there were some issues that they didn’t have the time to explore during all six seasons. So they wanted to find a way of addressing some of those questions because she kept hearing things like, “What about Tina? How come we never met her parents?” So they literally used the contents of the interrogation tapes to answer those questions.

Q. Why, at the end of season one, did you cut out one of the best characters, Marina? I’m asking both of you, from a creative point of view and from another character’s point of view?

A. (Jennifer) “I don’t know why she cut Marina but, I don’t know why Dana died, why Tina’s sister raped her, why Jenny was peeing on somebody…I just go, ‘What the hell?’” She also said that it’s hard when a character disappears and it feels sometimes like it’s a friend who moved away and you try to focus on other things but you can’t get back the joy that was there.

(Ilene) There are many reasons that those things happened and these kind of questions probably shouldn’t be answered because they are complex and they don’t necessarily have to do with a storytelling decision. Sometimes they have to do with a business decision, sometimes it has to do with people’s personal lives changing, or when they go off to do something else, whether due to another job or family reasons. There are answers to those questions that just don’t belong in this type of forum and it’s the best way to answer honorably.

Q. When it was suggested to make Bette biracial, it brought up one of the most intriguing aspects of the character, especially because she had to deal with biracial issues. Usually in popular culture with every biracial character I see, the biracial issues don’t come up…could you explain as an actor how you dealt with those issues in bringing them to light and making them personal?

A. (Jennifer) She said that she primarily dealt with the materials at hand and she also used her own imagination. She wanted to explore the complexities of being biracial but being frequently identified as white. That, for Jennifer, was really specific and interesting.

Q. The interrogation tapes raised more questions so do you know how long they will go on and can they continue to be posted so we’ll get all of the questions answered?

A. (Ilene) Ilene said that she didn’t know for how long they will go on. They are on Showtime’s website and she wasn’t sure if they intended to keep them running. They were not planning to produce anymore but there’s plenty of material to work with so it might go for some time.

Q. Nobody could play Bette Porter but Jennifer Beals. Are you like her?

A. (Jennifer) She said that she’s very emotional and in her personal life she would love to take Bette Porter with her when she needs a good rant. She also said that she spends a lot of time in Vancouver. She runs a lot and there are woods in Vancouver where she loves to run. That place is her sanctuary, her home and recently there was a woman who was running there one afternoon and she was murdered. (Here’s the article about that ).

And then later that week Jennifer was helping them to organize the run. She said that mostly she was helping to make posters at Kinko’s to warn everyone about what happened there and to make a banner for the run that they organized to take back the woods and to honor the family. At one point she was talking to one woman who was the organizer of the event (at that point Jennifer turned to Kim and asked if she could swear; Kim said it was okay and Jennifer did). She basically said that she would take that “blip’s blipping blip” and do something painful with it. The woman told her that they were not allowed to say that and Jennifer thought, “Why are we not allowed to say that? Are we not allowed to say that as women or because we have to be respectful to the family?” If it’s because of the family then Jennifer would understand why but if it’s because we are women and we should keep quiet and be afraid to go to the woods, then she didn’t understand. We shouldn’t be afraid and we should take what’s ours. Then she added, “And that’s when I knew that Bette Porter was alive.”

Q. I’ve heard about you being a photographer and that you took photos behind-the-scenes from the beginning of The L Word and I was wondering what are you planning to do with that project?

A. (Jennifer) She said that she took a lot of on-the-set photos and she wanted to put them into a photography book for the cast and the crew as a memento of the six years on the show. Recently she was invited to an L Word Convention and she brought a few prints with her to auction off to raise money for various charities. People were incredibly generous at the auction. She was thinking of this global recession and the fact that a lot of different organizations are having a difficult time and she thought that it would be great if she could make this book available to the fans and take the royalties to give it to different charities. If she is forced to put it on line and make it an e-book then she’ll do it; but if she would prefer to find a publisher and publish it as a regular book.

(At that moment Kim said that she hadn’t heard about L Word conventions and Jennifer replied that they are happening in England and there’s one that’s going to be in Australia, which means that she at least knows about it and the convention’s organizers already hinted that they were talking to her publicist about inviting Jennifer to Sydney.)

Q. Can you tell us anything about you future projects and what you’ve been working on?

A. (Jennifer) She mentioned her film “Book of Eli” with Denzel Washington, Gary Oldman and Mila Kunis that is coming out in January 2010. It was a terrific experience and it’s going to be a great film, and Jennifer said that she’s very proud of it. She also mentioned her appearance in a couple of episodes of “Lie to Me” with her very good friend, Tim Roth. She had a great time playing his ex-wife.

Q. You’ve already made it clear what you think about Tina’s interrogation tape, can you tell us what you think about Bette’s?

A. (Jennifer) She hadn’t seen Bette’s interrogation tape because she doesn’t like to watch herself but she watched the other tapes. Ilene added that she was trying forever to make Jennifer watch herself but to no avail. Jennifer said that she’s probably in a minority of celebrities who don’t like to watch themselves but she likes to be in the editing room with the director and talk about various takes and the direction of the story. She feels that she has the experience of the scene and when she goes to the editing room, she learns more about the editor and the director than about herself as a character. She likes to hear their interpretation and sometimes it’s helpful and sometimes it’s incredibly frustrating because she gets disappointed easily.

Q. Did you hear Laurel Holloman’s Bravo A-List acceptance speech and what was your reaction?

A. (Jennifer) “I didn’t see it, what did she say?” (That question got a lot of applause and laughter). The fan gave a short version of what LH said, including the part about sitting on Jennifer's face. JB laughed and said that Laurel is a wicked gal (at least that’s what I think she said because it was hard to hear as everyone was laughing, including Jennifer. Someone else mentioned that Jennifer said “witty gal”). Jennifer also added that she’s always the last to know about anything and Mia is the first to know. Then Ilene said that she’s the last to know, right after Jennifer.

Q. Another question about the sex scenes.

A. (Jennifer) In the beginning of the first season they got together to watch a tape with various sex scenes (both gay and straight) that Rose Troche gave them, She wanted them to look at the scenes and see which ones worked and which ones didn’t work and why. They watched that tape as a cast and they realized that they could feel when an actor was fearful and all of a sudden the story was broken. They all vowed in that room, that day to be fully committed because they didn’t want to break the story, they didn’t want to appear fearful.

Then Jennifer told the story about filming a scene in “Lie to me” when Jennifer’s character was walking across the room in her bra, putting on her shirt and the camera was following her moves, and traveling up to her face. The camera man said to her, “Don’t worry, we’re not lingering on your…,” and Jennifer replied, “Honey, I’ve done The L Word, you can linger where you want to linger.” She also said that she doesn’t feel shy about sexuality anymore. “Sexuality is sexuality and it’s all good.”

Q. A woman, who is also a runner, talked about the story that Jennifer told previously and then asked her about future marathons and triathlons.

A. (Jennifer) She mentioned the triathlon in Vancouver and then said that she would like to do a New York City marathon and a Half Iron Man. Her family is very supportive so that’s a possibility but it also depends on her work schedule. She added that she doesn’t have to be fast, she just wants to finish.

Q. A fan wanted to know about the evolution of Bette Porter. After Bette’s interrogation tape she felt that Alpha Bette was gone, so what about the future for Bette Porter, where is she going?

A. (Ilene) It’s not that Bette had gone from a career-driven to a family-oriented person but she became someone who accommodated all the things in her life that are now important to her and have value. Bette is more rounded but at the same time she is still flawed. Ilene said, “We couldn’t just say, ‘Okay, now she’s perfect’, because then the story would be over.” Bette still has stuff to work on.

(Jennifer) She agreed with what Ilene said in terms of Bette valuing family. Bette realized that she didn’t have to be so work-driven and family and love is so incredibly important. So Bette’s more into the family now and is driven by love. It can help you to get away from fear, from anger and that’s what important.

At the end Jennifer said, “I want to thank all our fans so much. You, guys, inspire us and motivate us and have been so incredibly generous that I do want you to know that it meant a tremendous amount to everyone in the cast.”